Chunk's first church visit...

As the mother of boys, bodily functions like burping and farting, become anticipate much like knowing if your youngin sees Daddy peeing by the bushes, he's going to drop trout and follow suit. The first handful of times, you are in disbelief and fuss at them about doing such things publicly or simply at all, but after that you just learn to shake your head and not acknowledge the behavior in which they find hysterical.

I've spent the past 5yrs repeating "Please say excuse me." or "Next time excuse yourself from the room and go into the bathroom!' daily. I think at almost 6yrs old Minion has finally gotten the hang of the way things work, and knows he'll get the 'death stare' if he even cracks a smile after letting one rip in the middle of a restaurant or store.

Chunk on the other hand...is a 3wk old breastfed baby, and for whatever reason G.d didn't make babies with an "on/off" switch that is connected to their bums. I'm about to tell you a little story about Chunk's first visit to his Grandparent's church.

I'm not an active church goer, in fact I'm so active I don't show up for Christmas and Easter, but Minion has been asking to go to his Nani and PawPaw's church so I took the opportunity last Sunday to take Minion and Chunk. Minion went off to his age appropriate class during the church service and Chunk sat with Nani, my sister Kat, and myself in one of the back rows of the sanctuary.

During the first song I had gotten Chunk out of his carseat and he was snuggled up in my arms, at some point during the second song I'd offered him to Nani because I swear I'm getting tennis elbow from holding him!
Everything was fine, Nani was loving it and Kat was jealous, then the song ended, the sanctuary got really quiet...if I remember correctly there was prayer about to take place...suddenly Chunk let out this sonorous and full-toned noise that resulted in a sound much like a land-locked foghorn. A sound that no person should make, publicly or privately, but definitely not during prayer in the middle of church service!

Of course in my oh-so-classy mannerism I commented "Well, I guess we knows how he feels about this.", Kat who'd been previously jealous that Nani was holding Chunk had burst into laughter, Nani who'd been so proudly showing off her newest grandson was redder than a squished cranberry and trying not to laugh! Everyone in the church was looking around, you could hear chuckles from the front of the sanctuary as they glanced around with heads bowed trying to determine who'd done such a vile thing! The few backbooth dwellers around us were laughing and commenting about how rotten that sounded, and Chunk just laid there with a small grin appearing on his face looking as content as ever. After church word spread that it'd been Chunk who'd blessed the church, and everyone that came up to love on Chunk made a comment and had a laugh about it. 

Had it not been for spending the past 5(almost 6)yrs getting over my embarrassment of little boys just letting it rip, I probably wouldn't even consider going back. I'm just guessing Chunk wanted to wake a few sleepers up and some notoriety around the joint so he figured he'd make his presence known - thru sound and smell. Or perhaps it was his way of rebuking the demons...